Creating Healthy Boundaries

The voice inside…

Your partner’s words press against you. You want to meet their needs. Of course… you’d be wracked with guilt if you didn’t.

But you also hear another voice inside you.

Not again.

What was that?? Oh, well… you brush it aside and press on, grumbling (as usual) as you go to visit your partner’s parents.

The voice inside you knows you aren’t happy with this…

Come on… just tell them you don’t want to go!

But the other voice inside you (ALWAYS at its job) issues its standard message:

They’re not going to listen anyway. Don’t bother.

Just another day in the passenger’s seat of your own life…

And so it goes. You visit your partner’s parents, have an awful time as suspected, and go home.

Except something inside of you has broken. You’re sick of it. The voice inside is yelling!

Why don’t I ever get my way?

To which the other voice interjects:

Shut up! You’re such a child!

SOMETHING has to change!

That’s another thing your silenced inner voice says… a lot.

But how? You search inside yourself for answers, but the voices start to crowd in. They’re all talking at the same time, so you just give up.

Until one day when out of desperation, you mustered up the courage to take to Google.

Maybe you typed “healthy boundaries therapist” into the search box, which led you to this page… and a glimmer of hope welled up from somewhere deep inside you.

Are you wondering whether this can change?

Let me tell you: It can.

I’ve helped many people come to hear the voice inside – the voice that wants you to live YOUR life.

And in so many ways, your life starts with your boundaries.

When your father dismisses your feelings, you’re used to just walking away and angrily saying to yourself, “That old man will never change.” And it’s true… maybe he won’t.

But you’d probably feel better finally telling him how you feel: “When you dismissed my idea, Dad, it hurt my feelings. I want you to know that.”

Or when your mother guilted you into deferring your dreams, you gave in. “What kind of ungrateful person would I be if I didn’t give them what they wanted?”

What if you could say to her, “Mom, I love you, and I want you to be happy. I know that you’re happiest when I’m happy, and being a teacher, not a doctor, is what I’m passionate about. I hope one day you’ll understand.”

Wouldn’t that feel just a little bit better?

For a long time now, you’ve been putting aside what you’ve wanted…

But now, it’s time to balance the load.

You can acknowledge the needs and desires of your loved ones while also respecting your own.

By learning how to listen to yourself, you take the first step toward creating healthier boundaries. The guilt you feel when you “let down” someone you love isn’t a given. It won’t always be there if you allow yourself to understand it.

By asking you thoughtful and incisive questions, I’ll help you take a good look at your inner machinery and oil it so that it stops creaking along as it always has.

We’ll talk things through and examine them from every relevant angle.

We’ll tease apart your emotions from your unquestioned beliefs to see if the belief is really true… or if the emotions are so strong they make you think your belief is true…

…when you have more freedom to act how you’d like than you’ve ever considered before!

I’ll help you consider things practically: what will life look like if you take this path? And if you stay on this one, how will you feel in 5, 10 years?

Then we’ll see how exactly you’ve come to this place of blindly following what you think you have to do – and see whether you really need to in every case.

By untangling the mess of “shoulds” and fears inside, you can make clear and informed decisions about how you’d like to live.

You’ll discover just how much space and freedom you have to make the choices you want for yourself.

Let’s put you back in the driver’s seat of your life!

It’s time for you to stand up for yourself and pursue YOUR passions.

You don’t have to keep on this way… feeling overburdened, resentful, and desperate for a different course of action.

This life is waiting for you… it just takes a little effort to shift your perspective.

You can do this!

Start today by giving me a call for a free consultation: (919) 627-7329.